Will You Be There?
by cloakedauthor21
Summary: When dean is having a friends with benefits relationship with a girl who’s depressed, will he be there to save her when she goes over the edge, or will she slip through the cracks?
1. It Started With a Kiss

1. It started out with a kiss

"That was great, Mandi." he said as he was pulling his jeans on.

"Yeah." I said quietly as I tucked my hair behind my ear. I looked at the boy that I had fallen for so long ago.

"Don't be like that, Mandi." he said pulling his shirt on. My eyes narrowed on him, as my blonde bangs fell into my face.

"Be like what, Dean?" I asked standing up in front of him.

Dean flashed his award winning smile.

"Don't be all depressed that we hooked up, Mandi. You always get depressed after we hook up." he said putting his arms around me. "What do you want from me, Mandi?"

"How about something more substantial than hooking up every week? How about something outside this room?" I said pushing away from Dean. He chuckled as he sat down to put his socks on.

"And what would that prove? Making it official and putting a label on it isn't how you used to want it. What difference does it make now, Mandi?"

I turned away from him and wiped a tear way from my eye.

"Things change, Dean. People change. You're too self centered to notice."

I walked out of the room and made my way back to my dorm. Eden Hall was becoming another part of my life that I just wanted to erase, along with Dean Portman.

I took out my Nikon and hooked it up to my laptop. I had some good shots of the hockey game, if I could manage to write the article to go with them.

I was studying journalism at Eden Hall. That was how I met Dean. I did an article on him last year. At first, I wanted to keep it secret that we were sort of seeing each other. Now that I wanted more, he wanted to keep it hidden. He liked the fact that girls always threw themselves at him, and it repulsed me. But I had fallen for him, and I was sucked into the Dean Portman vortex.

I managed to pull myself together to write the article, but it didn't help my mood. I had been a little unstable lately, to put it lightly. Things at home had always been bad, and now they had gotten worse. Classes were becoming more demanding. I had to go to every sporting event to cover it for the school paper. The things with Dean were becoming more detached. It was a lot to put on my shoulders, and I was starting to feel the weight of it.

I grabbed my butterfly knife that my sister had given me before I had come here. She said that it was something to remember her by. I flipped it open and stared at the shining blade.

It just started as methodically flipping the blade open and closed, when the blade slipped and cut my finger. It wasn't a bad cut, but I liked the feeling of the pain and watching the blood flow. Then I took the knife and made a small cut on my wrist, and then another one. I kept going until I had several cuts across my arms. The pain felt good. It was a part of my life that I could control, and I liked the control that it gave me.

I took a shower and bandaged my cuts. I cleaned my butterfly knife and picked up my phone. I called Fulton, the one person I could talk to about Dean.

The phone rang three times before he answered.

"This had better be worth me leaving the hot girl at the pool table." he said answering his phone.

"I need your help, Fulton." I said, not being able hold back any raw emotion.

"What's the matter, Mandi? What happened this time?" he asked across the phone. "Do you want me to come over?"

"Fulton, I want something more than just hooking up with him. He won't." I said quietly.

"You didn't used to want that. Did you ever stop to think that maybe he never has."

"Damn it, Fulton. You're no help."

"I have to get back to that hot girl." he chuckled. "Everything works out in the end."

I hung up the phone and cried myself to sleep.

**Okay…I wrote a story where Dean was the bad guy, now I'm writing one where he'll be the good guy. You're welcome. ~cloakedauthor21**


	2. A Slow Downward Spiral

2. A slow downward spiral

I was late for class, having overslept, again. I knew that my grades were suffering, but I didn't care. My long sleeved shirt was covering my bandages, but I knew that the pain would fade. It would fade and leave me to feel the pain of my life.

Dean tried to talk to me all day at school, but I brushed off his words and gave him the cold shoulder. He wasn't worth wasting my time on.

As I was walking back to my dorm to skip dinner, I was thankful that I had the room all to myself. My former roommate had a nervous breakdown, and Eden Hall never replaced her. I enjoyed being alone whenever I wanted to be.

I threw my stuff on the floor and sat down on my bed. I rolled up the sleeves of my shirt and took the bandages off my cuts to look at them.

The longer I looked at the cuts, the longer that I wanted to feel that pain again. Before I even realized what was happening, I had my knife out and was making more cuts on my arms.

A knock at the door made me jump.

"Mandi? I know you're in there. Will you listen to me please?" Dean's voice called from the other side of my door. I pulled the sleeves of my shirt down and threw my knife into a drawer. I jerked open the door to find Dean standing there with a worried look on his face.

"What, Dean?" I asked as I let him into the room.

"You ran off so fast yesterday that you didn't hear me out." he said, making me scoff as I shut the door. "Will you listen to me, Mandi?"

I turned around and faced him. My face unreadable. He searched my eyes and shook his head as he continued.

"Mandi, look, we've been doing this for almost a year now. No one knows about it except Fulton, and you'd get yanked off sports if your editor knew that we were together. Your grades are falling and you seem so down all the time, Mandi. I know my grades aren't great, but you just seem so dark and distant all the time. Even when we're together. What's going on at home? You've been like this since summer break ended. Open up to me, Mandi."

It was my turn to shake my head as I sat on my bed and pulled my knees to my chest.

"Dean, what's the point of telling you? I want to be official so that I can know that you'll be there when I need you. And I'm not even talking about the sex, I'm talking about when I need you to be there for me. When I need someone to help me make it through the things that I'm going through. Will you be there?" my eyes were searching his face as he sat down on my bed.

"Honey, I'm here now, aren't I?" he asked taking my hand. He rubbed my arm and a little blood dripped onto my hand. He froze. "Why are you bleeding, Mandi?"

I jerked my hand away from him and stood up.

"I scratched myself on the door-jam again, Dean. That damn thing is a hazard to my health. Now, please, leave."

Dean didn't seem altogether satisfied with my response. He sighed and hugged me before leaving.

I cried myself to sleep again thinking about Dean and the way things were at home. It wasn't fair. The week was a blur as I spent time avoiding Dean and time in my room, taking out my feelings with my knife on my arms.

I found myself back in Dean's room before I knew what was happening. Damn autopilot.

I pushed away from him.

"What, Mandi?" he asked, breathlessly.

"I can't do this anymore, Dean. I can't take it. I'm done." I said fixing my shirt and pulling my hoodie back on. I didn't want him to see the cuts and I couldn't handle him now.

"What's going on, Mandi?" he asked grabbing my arm before I could leave. I flinched slightly at the pain from my cuts.

"Dean, I can't. I just can't. Let me go." I pulled out of his grip as he watched dumbstruck.

I couldn't hide the tears as I walked back to my room. The quiet of my room was what I sought.

I got out my knife and let the cold blade slide its relief over my wrist. I was so wrapped up in my head that I didn't even notice Dean opening my door.

"Mandi, what are you doing?" he asked shutting my door and walking over to me. He took the knife out of my hands. "Are you crazy? Mandi, talk to me!"

He was holding me as I started sobbing.

"Dean I'm tired. I'm tired of everything. At home, here, I'm tired of it. I don't want any of it anymore. I just want to disappear. Everything would be better that way." I said hurriedly, through the sobs.

"Don't say that, Mandi. Don't say that." he was crying when I looked up at his face. "Please don't say that. You're scaring me. We can work through this, Mandi. We can get through this. I've always wanted more, I just didn't want to tell you. And I wanted to know what caused the change in you. Mandi, it'll be alright." he said.

"Will it?" I asked emotionlessly as he kissed my forehead.

**Okay guys, that's chapter two. Very dramatic, which is my specialty, as you know if you read "What Can You Do?!" Obviously Mandi doesn't believe Portman, so who knows what's to come….only I do. Keep reading and reviewing. I need motivation from my lovely fans.**


	3. Wanting More

3. Wanting More

"I'll help you through this, Mandi."

Dean's words were ringing in my ears as I sat in the shower letting the water pour over me. My tears mingled with the water. A part of me wanted to believe him, but I didn't know what could be done.

"Mandi? Honey, are you all right?" Dean's voice called from outside the bathroom door.

I stood up and turned the water off. I got into my pajamas and opened the door to face Dean.

I folded into his arms and he lead me over to the bed. I sat down and he knelt on the floor.

"Please tell me what's been going on, Mandi." he said with a pleading look in his eyes.

"You know that things have never been good at home, Dean. But, when I went home for the summer break, things were worse. He was drinking again and he was beating her. I tried to stop him, I did. But he just hit me, too, Dean. He beat me like a dog. And said all these horrible things about me and about her. I just broke inside.

When I came back, I felt like there was no point. I wanted more because I felt like you were just using me, Dean. Like you didn't care about me one way or the other. I just couldn't handle everything that was going on with school, and home, and you. It just put all this stress on me, Dean. I can't handle it." I let my head drop. He pulled my chin up and looked into my eyes.

"I'm here now, Mandi. I'm here for you." he said quietly.

He kissed me gently on the lips, his fingers gently brushing the hair out of my face. He pulled away and ran his fingers lightly down the cuts on my arms.

"Oh, Mandi." he whispered. "Please, stop cutting. I don't want you to die, Mandi. Even if your father doesn't care about you, I do. There are other ways to vent, please don't take it out on yourself like that. I'll help you through this, Mandi."

I pulled away from him and pulled my legs onto my bed. I turned away from him.

"I'm tired, Dean." I said quietly. He nodded his head.

"Okay, Mandi. I'll see you tomorrow then." he said standing up. He kissed my fore head and started for the door.

"Are you sure that you want more, Dean?" I asked quietly before he opened the door. He stopped and turned around.

"Mandi, I've always wanted you. And you deserve more than just what we've been doing. I'm sure that you're what I want." he said quietly before leaving me to the silence of my room.

As I fell asleep that night, Dean's words played over in my head. I only hoped that he meant what he said.

**Well, its not much, but here's chapter 3. A little look into what Mandi's been going through. Will Dean keep his word though, that is the question. Review please, it keeps me going.**


	4. You Can't Handle the Truth

4. You Can't Handle the Truth

I was walking out of my dorm when I heard my name being called. I turned to face the voice. It was Dean.

"Hey, Mandi. How're you feeling?" he asked slinging his arm around my shoulders.

I could practically hear the thoughts creeping into people's heads as we walked down the hall. It almost made me shy away from his touch.

"I'm okay." I said quietly, more to myself than Dean.

People were staring and whispering when we finally made it down to breakfast. The team wasn't too pleased to see me with Dean. It made me nervous as I sat down between Dean and Fulton.

"Look what the dog dragged in." Charlie muttered from the other side of Fulton. I felt my eye twitch as I looked down at my hands in my lap.

"You have a lot of nerve showing up here, Mandi. After what you wrote about us." Connie said from across the table.

"I'm just a journalist. I report the truth as best I can." I muttered quietly, not meeting the eyes of the team.

I had written an article a few weeks earlier about the team having lost half of their games. I wrote the truth about how poorly they had been playing and I had revealed insights that Dean had given to me about why they had been playing as such. They didn't take it too well. Dean had assured me that it would blow over, but apparently it hadn't.

"Don't think that just because Dean's all about jumping into your bed, that the rest of us Ducks will be welcoming you into our midst." Adam said coldly.

I felt a pressure on my chest as I stood up and walked away from the Ducks and their words fueled by hate. I couldn't take it, their words stung me like a blade. Dean caught up with me in the hallway.

"Mandi, don't let them get to you like that." he said holding me close to him. "They don't mean it." I scoffed at him and pulled away.

"Yes they do, Dean. They really do." I said as I started walking away. "I can't do this, Dean. I thought I could, but I can't. All the people staring and whispering. The rest of the Ducks hate me because of the article that I had to write." I stopped and faced him, tears stinging my eyes. "I thought that this was what I wanted. I really did, Dean, but I can't handle this. It's just as bad as our secret affair, only now it's in the open for everyone to see. I can't take it."

I leaned against the wall and slid down to the floor. Dean was next to me before I even noticed him move. He was holding me to him, unsure of what I was saying.

"I can't do this, Dean." I whispered. "I can't be with you."

Before Dean could even mutter a response I had gotten up and was walking away, the tears falling silently. I went into a nearby bathroom and calmed myself down enough to go to class.

I let myself slip further into my depression throughout the day as I sunk into my head. The more I thought about things, the worse I made them seem to myself.

As I was heading back to my room during dinner, my R.A. caught up with me.

"Hey, Mandi. This package came for you." the tall girl said, smiling as she handed me the package from my sister.

"Thanks, Jen." I said as I walked the last few feet to my room and locked the door.

I tore open the box and quickly read the letter from my sister.

"Chicky, don't tell mom that I get you this. She'd kill me. I'm sorry I wasn't there to save you over the summer. Hugs and kisses, lovely. -Dani"

As I opened the box to see a bottle of Goldschlagger, I knew what she meant. Our mother would kill her if she knew that I had this liquor. A slight smile played on my lips as I pulled a shot glass off my bookcase.

About ten shots in, there was a knock at my door. I ignored it as I kept throwing shots back. I was determined to drink away my pain, and while my body was numb, my mind wasn't yet. The knocking at the door got more urgent towards shot number twenty. I couldn't get up to answer the door. I could still feel pain, so I dropped the shot glass, because I couldn't focus my eyes enough to poor, and started drinking from the bottle. I was about halfway through with the bottle when Dean's voice came from the other side of my door.

"Mandi, are you alright?" he called.

Curious, and drunk off my ass, I managed to stumble to the door and let him in, locking it back. He looked from the bottle in my hand, to me stumbling back to my bed and heaved a sigh.

"I wanted to talk to you about today." he said quietly, sitting on the bed next to me. I took another mouthful of the cinnamon liquid before I faced him.

"Can't you see I'm trying to forget today. I broke up with you. All three of you." I said pointing to all three of him that I saw.

"If you keep drinking right now, you're going to die, Mandi." he said calmly as he tried to take away my bottle. I wouldn't have it.

"Hey! This is mine. Can't you see that maybe I want to die, Dean? Can't you see that death would be better than this shit hole I'm living? Let me die in peace." I said taking another sip.

"What would your death prove, Mandi? That you were a coward that couldn't face the world when it got hard. I had a bad childhood too, Mandi. I know what it's like to see your father hit your mother then hit you. You don't want to die, you just can't handle the truth of the situation. You don't want to believe that I want to be with you. You don't want to believe that someone actually thinks that you're worth something. The Ducks will get over themselves, Mandi. You just need to stand up for yourself to them. I don't want you to die, because you've helped me more than you'll ever know." he said rubbing my back. I gave up my liquor and lied down on my side as he promised to watch me all night to make sure I would be alright.

I faded out of consciousness as he was calling Fulton to let him know what was going on. I only hoped that he would be there when I woke up.

**Wow, I know Mandi has issues, but wasn't that an intense chapter? Stay tuned to see what happens when she wakes up. Review please so that I know that I'm not just writing for myself. ~cloakedauthor21**


	5. Blurry

5. Blurry

When I unglued my eyelids to see what that weight at the foot of my bed was, my eyes focused slowly. I blinked a few times and saw Dean with his back against the wall, asleep sitting up. My head was pounding and I couldn't remember why.

As I looked at my clock, I saw that it was lunch time and I had missed all of my classes so far. I knew that there was no way that I was going to class with this headache.

I nudged Dean with my foot, my voice failing me. He stirred slightly but didn't wake up. I sat up and my head swam. I rushed to the bathroom to acquaint myself with the toilet bowl.

I didn't hear Dean come in until he pulled my hair back and held it there. He rubbed my back and chuckled slightly.

"So you decided to join the land of the living?" he asked with a mocking smile on his face. I glared at him for a minute while resurfacing. "You were the one who drank half a bottle of liquor trying drown your sorrows."

I gave him the finger as my dry heaves started. Damn that Goldschlagger.

"I want to die." I gasped, flushing the toilet.

Dean picked me up off the floor.

"You're hung over, you just feel like you're dying. You don't want to die." he said as he started pulling my clothes off.

"Dean, I don't want to have sex, now. I feel like shit." I said trying to fight him off. He chuckled and shook his head.

"I'm putting you in the shower, Mandi. It'll make you feel a little better." he said turning the water on.

I let him finish stripping me without putting up too much of a fight. He kissed my cheek and nudged me towards the shower.

"Will you be there when I get out?" I asked with more pleading in my voice than I intended.

"I'm not going anywhere, Mandi. I promise."

I thought about his words as the water ran over my aching muscles.

"Hey, Dean?" I called after a few minutes. I waited as he came back.

"What do you need, Mandi?" he asked with a note of concern in his voice.

"What did you mean by you're not going anywhere?" I asked as I let the water pour over me.

"That I'm not gonna let you leave me over something so stupid as the Ducks' behavior. You're stuck with me for as long as you'll have me, Mandi. I'm not gonna leave you. I'll always be there. I promise." his voice said from the other side of the glass.

I felt tears coming and couldn't suppress my sob as my emotions overcame me. I know Dean heard my sob because he opened the glass and scooped me into his arms.

"What's the matter, Mandi?" he asked as he rubbed my back tenderly.

"I've never had someone stay with me through anything. I've never had anyone to be there for me." I sobbed into his wet shirt.

"Well, I will be, now." he said. "I'm gonna go back to my room to change but I'll be back. Finish your shower, Mandi."

I nodded and let him go. As I finished my shower, I prayed that God would make me happy with Dean.

**Thank you to my lovely readers. I already know how I'm going to end this, so you'd better stay on your toes! Review for me darlings and I will continue to update quickly. ~cloakedauthor21**


	6. Meetings

**I hear that I have been skating over the problems and not dealing with them realistically…well, sadly, that's the way that its supposed to be. Mandi is based on me and I tend to skate over the problems and her and Dean are just teenagers. Teenagers don't usually deal with problems unless they absolutely have to, so thank you for bringing this to my attention I'm sorry for the confusion. But thank you to all you who read and review! You make this possible! ^-^**

6. Meetings

--Dean's POV--

I was leaving Mandi's room so that I could put clean, dry clothes on. I was planning on staying with her again tonight. Fulton wasn't in the room when I got there.

As I was grabbing a couple of movies, he walked in.

"Coach is pissed that you missed morning practice, man." Fulton said matter of factly.

I looked at Fulton. The look I gave Fulton asked the question for me.

"I didn't tell him why you weren't there. I just said that you had some personal business to attend to."

I nodded as I finished collecting what I was taking back to Mandi's room. I knew that Coach wouldn't give up that easy without a meeting.

---Mandi's POV---

I was putting on my favorite jeans and t-shirt when Dean came back from his room.

"What's up?" I asked upon seeing the look on his face.

He shook his head and dismissed my question.

"I brought some movies and stuff." he said indicating what he had in his hands. I nodded and looked at the clock. It was quarter after one.

"Shit." I said grabbing my hoodie and pulling it on. "I have a staff meeting in fifteen minutes. I might be able to get away with missing class, but I can't miss that. Sorry."

Dean just nodded his head.

"I have to go talk to Coach anyway." he said pulling me into a hug. I didn't return the gesture.

I grabbed my camera and my notebook as we were walking out the door.

Dean took the stairs to go to the rink and I took the elevator to go to the paper office.

Everyone was already there when I arrived and they immediately stopped their discussion when I walked in. I knew what they were talking about and I tried to not care.

"Okay, fellow journalist. The time for change in assignments is here." Jerry, our editor, said looking around the room. "Evin, you'll be on sports. Prissy, on music. Mandi, on editorials."

I didn't listen to what else he said, because I didn't like being taken off of something real and put on crap like editorials. When everyone filed out of the room, I sat down across from Jerry at his desk.

"Jerry, editorials? Really?" I asked with an expressionless face.

"I know you don't think much of editorials, Mandi, but your sports reviews might be compromised with you dating a member of one of the teams. Besides, editorials will be easier for you write and it'll be less stressful." he said not looking at me.

"Who says I'm stressed out?" I asked knowing that someone had set me up for this.

"It's not hard to tell. With bags under your eyes and you missing classes, Mandi. I'm just trying to give you a break. Don't see me as the bad guy here. When you seem less stressed I'll switch you out of editorials."

I stood up and walked out of his office without saying another word. I was not happy for getting knocked off of sports, but I knew that it was going to happen. I hated being right. As I was walking back to my room, I got a phone call from my sister.

---Dean's POV---

When I arrived at the rink, Coach was in his office. I walked the beaten path to his office and knocked on the door. He looked up and motioned for me to come in.

"Portman, I was expecting you. Fulton said that you weren't at practice this morning for personal reasons. Why'd you miss practice?" Coach asked looking up from his playbook.

"I'm afraid I can't tell you why exactly, Coach. It was extremely personal." I said receiving a look that was disappointed. "I can't betray my friend's trust. She needed me to be there for her, Coach."

"I see. You're benched until further notice due to your absence, Portman. Team rules are team rules." he said with a look daring me to challenge him.

"I understand, Coach." I said getting up.

"And Portman, sometimes things happen and you can't control them. If there's something going on that you can't handle, my door is open." he said, trying to coax me into telling him what was going on.

"Thank you, Coach." I said walking out of his office.

When I got back to Mandi's room, she was back and was lying on her bed crying.

---Mandi's POV---

I was lying on my bed in tears when Dean walked back into my room.

"What's wrong, Mandi?" he asked pulling me into his arms.

"Dani called and-" my sentence broke off as I shook with sobs. "My mom-she's- oh Dean- she's dead. He killed her last night. Then he killed himself when the police got there. They're gone."

I was overcome with sobs again as Dean held me and kept me company.

**Okay guys, hope you all had a nice Thanksgiving. I went to see my family in New Jersey and managed to find time to write this. I know that it's a little short, but it's an update. What's gonna happen to poor Mandi now? Only I know! *insert evil laugh here* Will Dean stay true to his word? Don't you wish you knew. Review my beloved fans, I know that I'm an evil author, but you know you love the story so show it some love and review if you won't review for my sake. If you have any questions or comments or suggestions, don't be afraid to send those in too. I'm always open to ideas.**

**~cloakedauthor21**


	7. Will This Ever Stop?

7. Will this ever stop?

I had finally talked myself out of going to the funeral for the thirteenth time when Dean came into my room. He was in a black t-shirt and jeans. He eyed my pajamas curiously.

"C'mon, Mandi. You've got to get dressed. It's almost time to leave." he said pulling me into a hug.

"I'm not going, Dean. I've finally decided that I'm not going." I said quietly sitting on the edge of my bed.

There was a knock at my door as it opened revealing my sister, Dani thanking my R.A. for leading her to my room.

"Mandi, what's gotten into you?" Dani asked closing my door. She stopped and looked at Dean with a questioning look. "Hi. I'm Dani, Mandi's older sister."

"I'm Dean Portman, Mandi's boyfriend." Dean said feeling awkward about being in my room with my sister. "Uh, Mandi, I'll wait for you downstairs."

I watched Dean leave my room and let my eyes travel to my sister who was in a knee length black skirt and a simple black blouse.

"Mandi, I don't know what has been wrong with you lately, but you're going to the funeral. And what was he doing in your room?" Dani asked as she started rifling through my closet.

"He was trying to make me go to the funeral. It's not like we haven't slept together. He's the guy that I was telling you about a while back." I said defending Dean against my sister.

"That guy that you were friends with benefits with?" she asked pulling a pair of black jeans and contemplating them.

"Yeah. We became official a little while ago." I said taking the jeans from Dani.

"Is he good to you, Mandi?" she asked pulling out a long sleeved thermal shirt and tossing it to me.

"Yeah, he's wonderful." I said nonchalantly as I pulled the jeans and long sleeved shirt on. "I couldn't ask for anyone better. He really cares about me."

I joined Dani at my closet to search for a t-shirt. We finally settled on an Iron Maiden shirt with Eddie pulling the strings of the devil from _The Number of the Beast_. I pulled it on and ran a brush through my hair.

"Well, I just hope that you don't get hurt." Dani said handing me my sunglasses.

I put my sunglasses on and pulled my etnies on.

I pulled my hair into a ponytail as we walked down to the main lobby where Dean was waiting as he said he would be.

"Are you riding with me or him?" Dani asked me quietly as we approached Dean.

Dean looked at me expectantly and I looked at Dani as we stopped in front of him. I stepped closer to Dean and let him put his arm around me as I buried my face in his chest.

"I'll see you there, Mandi." Dani said waving slightly as she walked out of the lobby toward her car.

"It'll be alright, Mandi." Dean said as we started toward his car.

The gathering at the funeral was small. I knew that my parents didn't have that many friends, but it seemed that most of the friends they had were scared away by the murder/suicide. The people that were there were grouped tightly around Dani and me, as if they were trying to give us strength. I knew that none of them knew what life was like at home for us girls, and none of them had suspected what it was really like.

After the funeral was over Dani pulled me aside to tell me something important.

"When I told the administration about our parents, they told me that since you're 18 and you have a scholarship, you're good. The scholarship will get you through until graduation. I have to go, Mandi. Take care of yourself." Dani said pulling me into a hug.

"I'll talk to you later, Dani." I said returning the hug and watching my sister walk off.

Dean and I left the cemetery and headed back to Eden Hall. He held my hand to try to reassure me that everything would be alright. But I wasn't so sure. I had the strange feeling that something horrible was going to happen soon.

It wasn't long after we got back to Eden Hall that I had to get started on the editorials for the school paper, and Dean had to go to hockey practice.

The editorials were as easy and dreadfully boring as I had known it would be. When I completed it, I put it in my folder and walked down to the paper office to turn it in. jerry was there when I walked through the door.

"Oh, Mandi. I heard about your parents and I'm terribly sorry. Is there anything you want to talk about?" he said as I laid my folder on his desk.

"Thanks for your concern, Jerry, but I don't need to talk about my parents." I said walking out of the office.

I found as I walked through the halls on my way back to my dorm that people were whispering about my parents' deaths. It didn't bother me because I was finally free.

I was a little sad and shocked when I first learned the news, but I was looking forward to getting out of their suffocating grasp anyway. They were trying to make me a deadbeat like them, but I was too rebellious to let them.

Being orphaned at 18 was tragic, but it probably would have been worse if my parents had been more loving and caring. Since they were abusive, it didn't affect me that hard.

When I reached my dorm, Dean was already there. He had wet hair from his shower and a smile on his face.

"I've got a surprise that will cheer you up, Mandi." Dean said standing up and giving me a hug. "Grab your camera and come with me."

"Alright, Dean." I said grabbing my camera and following Dean out the door.

There was no way that I could have known what would have happened next.

**Well lovelies, this is chapter 7. Mandi has some foreboding thoughts and feelings, but are they all in her head? Stay tuned to find out. Thank you to all of you who read and review! Show Mandi some love!!!**

**~cloakedauthor21**


	8. Surprises

8. Surprises

**Okay guys, I would like to dedicate this chapter to awtr101fan, hermioneandmarcus, and emeraldgreyclouds. You guys deserve it. Thank you for your continued support! Now, on to the story….oh, by the way…I DO NOT own Mighty Ducks…just Mandi and Dani and the staff of the paper. I failed to put my disclaimer up…silly me…**

I didn't know where Dean was taking me, but the scenery was amazing. After half an hour, I couldn't contain my curiosity anymore.

"Where are we going, Dean?" I asked looking at the beautiful leaves changing with the weather.

"There's a park that Fulton took me to once. He used to go there to clear his head. I thought I'd take you there so you could get some good pictures for your portfolio." he said smiling as he said this.

"Dean, that's amazingly thoughtful." I said smiling at Dean's actions. Maybe those feelings I had earlier were all in my head.

When Dean pulled into the parking lot of the park, I got out and gasped at how beautiful the scenery was out there.

Dean followed me around as I was taking pictures of the trees and the landscape. I was even taking pictures of children playing on playgrounds. I was, for the first time in a long time, completely in my element and enjoying myself.

When the perfect light was gone, I put my lens cap on and faced Dean. My face was lighted and I was happy.

"I knew this would cheer you up, Mandi." Dean said as I hugged him.

"It did, Dean. This was the best thing anyone could have done for me. Thank you. It's been a long time since I could honestly say that I've felt happy. Thank you, Dean." I said as he lead me back to his car.

"Anything for you, Mandi. I told you that you're stuck with me." he chuckled as we got back into his car.

The ride back to Eden Hall was spent with me reviewing the pictures on my camera, and commenting on how perfect they looked.

Dean and I went to my room and put in a movie. As we were watching the movie, I fell asleep, safe in Dean's arms.

Over the next week, I was so much my old self that the stares of people didn't bother me, the comments of the Ducks were deflected and shot down by my own witty comments, and my grades were starting to improve.

Dean and I had made the park our place, since we occupied it so often. I had even begun to use him as a model. I found that he looked best in black and white, so I would manipulate the picture on my computer to make the background in color and make Dean black and white. He was very photogenic, and I manipulated it to my advantage. He was an excellent subject for my photos, even when I made him do live action shoots. He looked so graceful on his rollerblades.

Our relationship was blossoming into an exceedingly romantic one. It was almost as if we had expunged our previous relationship as our new one was more normal every day.

I was surprised at how everything was turning around for me. It made me feel secure and happy that my life had finally been blessed. I was thanking God for every day that I didn't wake up and find that everything had just been a dream.

**Okay guys, I know this chapter was short and I apologize for that. Sorry if it seemed to fluff…but twas necessary. Things are finally looking up for Mandi. Stay tuned to find out what's going to happen next. Show Mandi some love!**

**~cloakedauthor21**


	9. Reflections

9. Reflections

I was looking in the mirror on Saturday morning, admiring my reflection. Ever since I had started to feel happy, my appearance had shown this. The bags under my eyes disappeared as I got more sleep. My eyes were brighter and my skin almost glowed. My scars were lighter than I would have suspected that they would have been.

As I was looking at myself, in a tank top and hip hugging cargos, I looked past myself to my bed. Dean had twitched in his sleep and drew my eyes to him. He looked almost angelic when he was asleep.

Dean had been right about the team. When hockey season ended, they came around on their own. Now I was almost welcomed at their table by the girls who were eager for some extra estrogen to combat the testosterone. I had started using some of the other team members as subjects in pictures.

I quietly moved over to my desk and pulled my camera off of it. I knew that I would only have one chance at this shot and it had to be perfect. As I turned it on and focused it, I prayed that Dean wouldn't move as I took the picture.

When the camera flashed, Dean stirred and blinked his bleary eyes in my direction.

"Whadafuck?" he mumbled as he rubbed his eyes.

I put my camera back and sat on the bed, smiling.

"I love you, Dean." I whispered, kissing his cheek.

"Nnloveyoutonn." Dean mumbled rolling onto his back.

I chuckled slightly and shook Dean a little, watching him frown as I did. Eventually, he got into a sitting position.

"What time is it?" he asked when he felt awake enough to decide that it didn't matter since I wasn't going to let him sleep.

"Ten thirty. I wanted to go back to the park and get some more shots." I said as I pulled my blanket off of him.

My cell phone meowed, meaning I got a text. I opened it and laughed immediately. Dean's questioning gaze made me laugh a little harder.

"It's from your mom. She wants me to tell you that you need to charge your phone. And she wants to know if I'm going to come back for the next holiday." I said watching Dean's reaction.

"My phone is charged. It's just off when I'm here. I would hope that you would come back over. That was fun." Dean said making me roll my eyes.

"Get dressed and let's go." I said texting a reply to his mom.

When we got to the park, everything was going as it usually did.

Dean followed me, observing me as I took pictures of the things around me. I walked around everywhere, catching everything in its beauty. I never paid attention to where I was going, because I was too absorbed in the beauty of it all.

I was walking across the street with Dean to get a latte, when something spectacular caught me eye.

There was a kite, left over from summer, caught on a tree. The rainbow of colors on the kite contrasted so well with the barren tree limbs and gray sky that I stopped, in the middle of the street to take the picture of it.

As the shutter clicked, I heard Dean yell my name. I turned to look, but was suddenly flying through the air. I was in slow motion as I fell toward the ground. I heard brakes screeching and glass shattering. Someone screamed as my camera fell with a crash and shattered. My head slammed against the pavement and everything went black.

**Well guys I know I'm mean for leaving such a bad cliff hanger, but what can I say I'm a sadist. Haha. Hope you enjoyed! Show Mandi some love. Oh, any theories on what happened or whats going to happen? I'd like to hear them!**

**~cloakedauthor21**


	10. Things

10. Things

When I opened my eyes, there were a few people standing around me. I had a huge headache, but I sat up to look for Dean.

"Dean?" I called, not seeing him in the group around me. "Dean?"

I looked and saw another group of people surrounding something, or someone.

"Mandi!" I heard a choked, weak cry for me.

I stood up and stumbled over to the group.

"Dean?" I called again and saw the figure move. "Move! Let me through!" I yelled as I pushed my way through the crowd to see Dean lying on the ground.

He was in bad shape. There was glass all around him and his cuts were bad, but they were nothing compared to the rest of him. He was in a heap. I rolled him over so that I could see his face.

"I don't think you should move him. An ambulance is on its way." someone in the crowd said.

"Fuck off!" I snarled in their direction. "Oh, God, Dean."

I ran my hand down his face. His eyes fluttered open slightly.

"Mandi. You're okay." he whispered, a slight smile on his face. "At least I was able to be there for you. Don't miss me too much, Mandi." Tears sprung to my eyes at these words.

"You sound like you're going somewhere. Dean, just hang on. The paramedics will get here and they'll patch you up." I said making Dean shake his head slightly.

"No, Mandi. Listen to me. Tell Ma, that I love her." Every few words, Dean was wincing in pain. I held his head in my hands and tried to stay strong. "Don't hold back your feelings, it never ends well for you. I'll always be with…you. I…love…you…Mandi."

"I love you, Dean." I said with tears falling down my face.

"I know." he said, I could sense it was almost over. I could hear the sirens, but they were too far away.

I leaned down and kissed him, not caring about the taste of blood. A part of me hoped that everything would be okay, that Dean would be okay, but I knew that it wouldn't be.

I pulled away and looked at Dean as he saw me for the last time.

I was still sitting there, holding his head in my hands, when the paramedics came. I was sitting there sobbing as hard as I possibly could.

When I felt cried out, I walked over to my shattered camera and picked it up. At least the memory card was in tact, I put it in my pocket. The police questioned me and insisted that I let the paramedics see me. I refused point blank. It wasn't happening. I listened as the police called Dean's mom and told her the sad news. I got in Dean's car and drove back to Eden Hall.

Once I shut the door to my room, I went nuts. I started screaming and ripping posters off the wall, throwing my things on the floor and against the wall. I was wrecking everything in my room except my laptop. When the room was destroyed, I slid down to the floor. My phone scared me when it started ringing.

"Hello?" I said not even bothering to see who was calling.

"Hello, Mandi, dear." Dean's mom said on the other line.

"I know about what happened, Momma Portman. I was there. It's my fault. I was standing in the middle of the street taking a picture and I wasn't paying attention to what was going on. He saw the car and he threw me out of the way so I didn't get hit. It's all my fault. He died in my arms. There was nothing I could do to save him." I was crying again.

"Oh, honey, don't think about it like that. I know how much Dean cared about you. He saved you because he cared about you. We're having his body brought down here for the funeral. It'll be on Tuesday, dear. You can drive Dean's car down and we'll put you on a plane to go back. Will that be okay, honey?" Dean's mom was so comforting.

"Yeah, Momma Portman. I'll come down Monday after school. I'll see you then." I said wiping my tears.

"Take care, honey."

I hung up the phone and sat there, amongst my trashed room and took out my memory card to look at the pictures I had of Dean that I could set out for the funeral.

**Just when everything was going up for Mandi, everything shoots down. Show Mandi some love.**

**~cloakedauthor21**


	11. Saying Goodbye

11. Saying Goodbye

The drive down to Chicago was a quiet one, even with Fulton riding with me. We would alternate driving so the other could sleep, but it wasn't necessary. I hadn't slept since that night, and I looked like it.

By the time we got to Dean's house, I was almost fed up with Fulton trying to make me talk about my feelings.

When Momma Portman greeted us, I hugged her and handed her a bag of pictures.

"What's this, Mandi?" she asked as we walked into the house.

"The least I could do, Momma Portman. Those are the best shots that I took of him. I knew you'd want them. I thought they might look good at the funeral, too." my voice was hushed but so full of raw emotion. Momma Portman nodded as she set the bag down.

"Mandi, you'll be in Dean's room. Fulton, you can have the guest room." she said hugging us both, sending us to bed.

I grabbed my overnight bag and took it up to Dean's room. I stood in the center of his room and looked at his things. His action movies, his Blackhawks posters, his old hockey equipment, even his small shoe collection. I sat down on his bed and turned off the light.

It was like I could feel his presence with me as I lied down on his bed. It was like he was comforting me.

"I love you, Dean. Goodbye." I whispered to the dark.

"What goodbye?" I heard a voice ask me from the foot of the bed.

I sat straight up and could see a figure at the foot of the bed.

"Hi, Mandi." the voice said again.

"No. That's impossible. It's Dean's voice but I watched Dean die. Oh, my God, I've finally gone crazy." I was rambling. The figure came over to me and flicked the lamp on.

I gasped when I saw him. It was Dean alright, looking as he had the morning of the accident. "You're dead."

"I know." he said chuckling. "C'mon, I want to show you something."

He took my hand and led me outside, warning me not to look back. When we got outside, there was a beautiful light in front of the house with a figure in it.

"What is it?" I asked as I put a hand over my mouth.

"It's Him. It's time for you to come home with me."

I was led into the light by Dean and all the pain of life vanished away.

Article from the Chicago Times page 3.

Monday night the girlfriend of a late local hockey player, Dean Portman, was found dead in his bed the night before his funeral. According to the autopsy report, the girl, Mandi Ellis, suffered from an aneurism in her brain. Doctors believe it was the result of the fall she took when Portman saved her life.

The End


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